Monday, March 29, 2010

Smack, smack...

Saturday Fernando took me to work so he could take the girls skating.  Since he hasn't seen Bronson since my 8 week ultrasound, I asked one of the ladies I work with to scan me. It was WONDERFUL! Bronson was back to a head down position and he was all sleepy.  He wiggled and yawned a really big yawn, then smacked a few times.  It was so cute! The tech was able to show us his face really well.  Fernando got to finally see Bronson's boy parts. Talise got to touch the goo she squirted on my belly. Everyone was happy.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Two year stats

My sweet baby will be two in two days.  Today she had her two year check up. She is wonderful! She is in the 90 % for her height, 85 % weight and 70% head circumference.  She is developing normally. She is perfect. I already knew that though. Also, her amazing doctor gave her a Fancy Nancy book for her birthday.  She is the sweetest doctor!

Monday, March 22, 2010

Great Weekend! :)

Even though I did have to work, it was great. Saturday was crazy at work, but the day flew by.  That was nice because Fernando came home while I was at work. Actually,  he came home before I left for work and I didn't know it. I had driven up to his job site to bring him some things, just in case he was there, but I didn't know his truck number.  He was there but asleep and didn't see me.  Oh well.  It was great to talk to him on the phone.  It was a relief to know that he was home with our girls.  It was amazing to come home to him after a hard day at work. I helped him with his logs and we basically tried to catch each other up on what had went on for us during the week. He told me that when he saw the girls he started crying. He said he knew they were beautiful, but didn't realize just how much so until he wasn't able to see them every day.  Sunday I was not happy at work. Then I got to see Bronson! He is looking so cute! I could see his face getting plumper, and his tiny little nose. His lips look full and he kept sticking out his tongue! He put on a little show for me and that made my mood improve tremendously! When I got off of work I had to take Fernando back to his truck so he could get to Mississippi before 7 a.m. to drop off his load. It was hard, more so on him I am sure.  He has to leave everything familiar behind. That saddens me. It also makes my heart fill with love for him knowing that he really doesn't want to leave us but does to help our family. Talise said he cried earlier that day and when she asked him why he said because he had to leave us again. I love him so and pray that God keeps him safe. He called this morning and made it to his destination safely and on time! Now we just count down for the next time we meet!

Friday, March 19, 2010


I am a happy girl. Although my sweet husband can't stay home just yet, he is driving through and stopping in Roanoke to pick up some paperwork. So, we are going to visit with him.  Then he will be going to Mississippi to drop off a load and hopefully be home during the week.  That means I'll actually get to spend time with him! That is such a blessing!

Thursday, March 18, 2010

No more Joy...

At least not from seeing my husband today. He is stuck overnight. UGH! But, I can list some things I am joyful about. 
1. Mylie "tatooing" my back
2. The sun is out and it is very nice outside.
3. The girls aren't screaming.
4. My husband is safe.
5. Bronson has been a total wiggle tail today.

Oh Joy!

My beautiful husband should arrive either tonight or tomorrow morning.  I am REALLY hoping he gets home tonight. I will drag my behind out of bed in the middle of the night with both girls happily to go get him. I am SO excited!

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Fractures and fevers

Poor Mylie. Poor, poor Mylie. She has really had a rough go of it. First she busts open her chin last week, then last night she breaks her nose. I feel horrible.  Iwas sittig ong the sofa and Talise was sitting in a kiddie chair while Mylie was riding a toy granny got her. We were watching Old Dogs. Mylie was leaning forward as she rolled for momentum. As she rolled towards Talise with her little body leaning forward on the steering wheel Talise  put her foot out forward to push Mylie backwards.  Mylie went flying over the front of her toy face first on the wooden floor.  Talise immediately started screaming, I'm sorry, it was an accident.  Mylie got hysterical! That is the only way to describe her. She was red faced, screaming, crying crawling up my torso as I held her with her head buried in my chest and shoulder.  Blood was every where.  My first thought was her teeth.  Maybe she knocked them loose or out. Nope. When I finally got her calmed enough to look at her face she was already sounding congested. Her top lip was purple on the left side and it was hanging low over her bottom lip.  Her bottom lip was also swollen and purple.  I got her a cold rag for her mouth and went to get some Motrin for the pain and swelling.  That is when I noticed her nose.  the bridge of her nose was red and swollen. Under her eyes were a little dark. She said she needed to blow her nose so I got her a tissue and her mucus was blood streaked, bright red. I called her pediatrician and while I waited for them to call back I cried and called my mom.  I desperately wished for Fernando to be home with me.  My mom suggested I called the E.R. where I work. So I did. While I was waiting for a doctor to get on the line the nurse from the pediatrician's office called back.  I clicked over and all she said was to watch it for three days. That's IT? I was NOT happy with that answer so I called my hospital back. I spoke with one of the doctors who basically told me the same thing, only he explained why. That was nice and much more acceptable. Well then this morning I roll over and Mylie's little cheeks are pink and I feel her head.  She is burning up! I went online to web md and searched broken nose + fever and it said that she needed to be seen. We went in and saw a different pediatrician (our's wasn't available).  He was super. Excellent bedside manner. Mylie actually smiled and laughed at him, something she does not do with strangers.  He felt her nose, looked up there and then did the res of a normal exam.  It seems that the fever is viral and her nose is definitely broken. It should heal well, he wasn't concerned about it. He made me feel much better, and not at all neurotic for bringing her in. That was nice. Poor, sweet, Myliebel.

Monday, March 15, 2010

I have a heavy heart

It's only been two days.  TWO DAYS! I don't know how military wives do it. My mom came and watched my girls so that's one less thing for me to worry about.  They had fun and were well taken care of.  It was also very nice to come home to a spotless  house with an empty laundry basket and and a dish drainer full of clean dishes. That part is good. Not having a bed warmed up by my husbands body ~ no fun. Not having his legs to warm up my cold feet on, or his protective arms around me, or the sounds of deep breathes from his side of the bed.  BOO! He called, that was nice.  He arrived safely, thank God for that.  Still I cry. I have a heavy heart. Achy, dull, full of missing my husband.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Almost 2

That is just the craziest thought.  Mylie Isabel is almost 2.  TWO! It seems like only yesterday that I went in for my 38 week check up.  It was on a Monday, 3/24/08.  My dr. reached in and stripped my membranes as he told me that I was already 2.5 cm effaced and would I like for him to strip my membranes. A little late for that! I started spotting immediately. I went to BJ's to stock up on sanitary napkins, breast pads and snacks. I had contractions off and on all night. I had bloody show multiple times.  Fernando was SO excited.  he kept asking me if I needed to go to the hospital.  Not yet! I went to work and just wore a pad and breathed through the contractions when they came.  They were sporadic until Wednesday afternoon. Around 2 p.m. they started to get a little consistent, but were far apart. When I got off of work I looked up signs of labor.  Mostly because I could still talk during them, they weren't unbearable, but they radiated from back to front and down the inside of my thighs. Around  p.m. Fernando came home from work.  I told him that I thought we needed to go to the hospital.  I was really calm so he asked if he had time to shower. Sure! While he showered I just stood in front of the computer and swayed side to side. When he was good and clean he started messing around.  I reminded him to get my bag, we needed to go. He didn't believe me.  I told him yes, something is up, I needed to go.  we got in the car and got Talise and off we went. When I got to the hospital I told the nurses that I wasn't convinced that I truly was in labor, but something was up. They told me to get gowned up and they check me out and monitor me. Once I got the monitors on my belly they said I was definitely in labor and they checked my cervix. The nurse looked at me and asked if I wanted an epidural.  I said yup, when it's time. She informed me that I was dilated to a 6! I couldn't believe it. With Talise I had a horrible labor. I wa sin so much pain and scared and miserable. With Mylie, as corny as it sounds, I just closed my eyes and took deep breathes. I told myself this is what my body is made to do, let it happen.  It worked. I got the epidural because I was too chicken to try with out it and by 1:15 a.m. it was time to push.  I pushed maybe three times and my sweet Mylie Isabel Dutra was born gently at 1:18 a.m. She barely cried at all when they were cleaning her up and besides her swollen nose she was gorgeous. I remember that I looked over at her all angelic crying sweetly and I started giggling.  There was a student nurse there. Her name was Madonna, and she commented on my giggling. Once Mylie got cleaned up she resembled an orange Smurf. The most beautiful orange Smurf you've ever seen, but Smurfish none the less. The orange was due to jaundice, the Smurfishness was due to swelling.  She is still a sweet, angelic baby toddler.  She isn't perfect, she has her melt down moments, but she is darn close to it.  I cannot believe she will be two years old in 16 days. She's still my sweet baby.  I guess she always will be, after all, I prayed, begged and pleaded with God for her. When he blesses, he really goes all out.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Something All the Time

Here lately my sweet Doodles has been so very clingy.  Mostly to my husband, she often times refuses to come near me at all if he is around.  I think she knows that he will soon be gone a lot. She wakes up at five a.m. with him begging to be held. She cries and has fits any time he tries to put her down. That's not really so bad, just a bit irritating. What is truly bothersome is she has been getting hurt ALL THE TIME! Just over the weekend she slammed her fingers in the door and fell and scraped her leg.  I know, toddlers fall. They get scrapes. It's normal. Well, Monday, since it was so pretty out we all went outside to play. Fernando was chasing Talise around while Mylie played with a garden bunny I have in the yard, and I sat and watched her. WHile Talise was running she turned to see where her dad was and fell backwards and hit her head. She started wailing. Mylie turned to see what was the matter and got so upset she started running towards her sister. She is very protective of her big sister.  Talise has an electric scooter that was plugged in being charged.  Mylie tripped over the cord while holding the bunny. She hit the concrete with her face busting the bunny open. That bunny cut her tongue, the inside of her cheek and busted under her chin. It was a deep boo boo. She has cuts from holding the bunny on her arms and legs.  She also has a big red spot n her forehead.  Off to the emergency room we went. She got calmed down and went outside with her daddy and sister. The hospital in Roanoke is quite small.  It reminded me of a hospital you'd see in a scary movie.  Tiny, old, tile walls, creepy. There were other sick people there right on top of us, so I was completely ok with them going outside.  Talise comes running inside with Mylie right behind her, only Mylie is too small to catch the door. The old glass door slams on her tiny fingers.  She yelped out so loud! Then came huge, loud sobs. Fernando popped Talises arm for letting go of the door. So Talise is crying, Mylie is screaming, and I am trying to calm them down. After a two hour wait, the doctor finally comes in to fix our baby.  Dermabond to the rescue. Mylie did wonderfully. She held real still and stared quite hatefully at the doctor while he cleaned out her chin and squeezed it together. This morning she woke up complaining about her boo boo's hurting.  I gave her some Tylenol and went to make her breakfast. Once her food was ready I moved the coffee table over and smashed her little toe! I felt horrible! It wasn't bad, but it was the point. Later this morning she closed the kitchen cabinet on her fingers.  This afternoon, while helping us wash our minivan she skinned both her knees. She has had a rough go of it! She looks beat up, poor baby. The cherry on top, her boo boo under her chin looks possibly infected.  It has gotten two crusty, white knots under the Dermabod so I will be calling the pediatrician in the morning.

Monday, March 8, 2010

All my aches and pains

Yesterday at work we were SO busy. Busy doesn't even do justice to what we were. My work day starts at 7 a.m. by 6:30 p.m. we had completed over 100 exams! That doesn't include to fluoroscopy cases and the operating room cases we did.  Usually a super, crazy, non-stop day means it's over before you know it.  SO NOT THE CASE!  The day dragged on forever. On a normal weekend I am wore out by Sunday. Working sixteen hours, sleeping about 5, then coming back into work for another sixteen hours is tough when I am not pregnant, now by about 3 p.m. I am exhausted. Now that my tummy is REALLY poking out and my balance is off, plus I have a broken toe which I can't take anything for, I am quite tired and irritable on Sundays. My toe was throbbing like a toothache. I have no choice but to walk on it. I was to close a patient's door and twisted my foot and felt pain shoot up the side of my foot on Sunday.  When I got home last night my toe was swollen pretty thick. I am debating on going to the doctor. I don't want to waste the money if they won't help, but taping it up just isn't helping.  My legs also cramp up a lot on the weekends.  I know it is because I am on them non-stop and being pregnant doesn't help. I just feel  whiny.  On a positive note, I got to see my little guy again. He is looking so cute! I could see where he is getting some fat on his little face. His heart looked perfect, actually all of him looked perfect.  He is already attempting breathing motions! His cord is perfect. I can't wait to really see him and hold him in my arms rather than my gut.  At the same time I like having him all to myself for as long as possible. This pregnancy is FLYING by! Mylie keeps me so busy, that I often don't even feel him moving around until after her bed time.  I don't mind being busy though.  I love that baby so much, she is a handful, but a delight. Both my girls are.

Friday, March 5, 2010

The count is on!

Fernando only has one more week of school.  Not even an entire week. Next Wednesday is his final day! I am So excited/proud of him! I am also getting very uneasy at the thoughts of being stuck out here in the middle of nothingville without anyone close by and my babies. My only means of defense is a b b gun used mostly to keep rodents and strays out of our trash bins. In a true danger type emergency the intruder would probably take it from me and beat me with it! I tend to freeze in danger type situations.  The idea of going into labor without him here REALLY freaks me out.  I am sure I could recruit one of my mommy and me momma's to drive me to the hospital if need be, but he brings me such comfort in situations like that. Even though it has been tight financially with him out of work we have really gotten used to him being home all the time.   I am sure Mylie will have a hard time adjusting.  Just with him going to school everyday has gotten her so clingy to him when he is at home.  He has to hold her all the time. We will all adjust I know.  It will definitely be a step in the right direction. I just don't like change. I will survive.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Dr.'s Appointment

All is well. My bp was excellent. Bronson's heart rate was 157. I've gained 13 lbs so far. I'm ok with that. Well, sort of.  My dr. is ok with it.  I am a little freaked out because I still have three months to pack on the pounds. I am going to try to lay off the carbs a bit. With summer coming up and all the good fruits in season it should help.  I did a fasting blood sugar, I feel good about that though. I only have 1 more 4 week appointment then it's on to every two weeks! I CANNOT wrap my brain around that. I don't look pregnant enough for that.  I am NOT prepared for it. I still have SO much to buy. Bronson has three summer outfits and that's it. I have Mylie's old swing, crib, and bouncer. I need EVERYTHING else.  I will start shopping once Fernando starts getting a paycheck.  Mylie's birthday is at the end of the month.  I have to buy he presents, something pretty to wear and schedule her two year pictures. I am overwhelmed!  I am not doing a big party for her. I am taking her to an inflatable play place and out to eat, having cake a simple decorations.  My mom will probably come over. I may bring little cup cakes, hats and favors to mommy and me that week.  I did really big stuff for Talise and she has no recollection so I am spending the party money on presents and such instead. I really want to get her this little pink motorcycle with a side car for her dolls and an outdoor water table. We'll see.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Tantrum Hell

Where has my sweet, loving, obeying, helpful little girl gone? I now have an opinionated, controlling, screaming little monster. She wants to be held ALL the time.  That doesn't really bother me much, except when I have to use the potty.  She doesn't want her daddy to leave her sight.  She wants to do everything by herself.  When she does need us she wants us to handle whatever the need is NOW! She's picking at her sister. She's a slapping, biting, kicking fool.  When she can't decide what she wants she bangs her head on the door, floor, washer, dryer, whatever is near by. Whenever the rest of the family tries to speak to anyone besides her she screams like a banshee, but only while we attempt conversation.  When we get quiet so does she.  UGH! I think she may be cutting a tooth. I am being extremely patient, but it is tough.  I keep telling myself, this is a normal, developmental stage, it will pass. Until then I REALLY need a drink, I will not partake, darn fetal alcohol syndrome!

Monday, March 1, 2010


I have read about so many babies struggling, fighting cancer, trying to recuperate from abuse, the list goes on. My heart is heavy and my prayers are many. I feel like I am begging God. I pray for these babies, their families, for the safety and health of my own children. I fear so much.  It is all consuming. I do A LOT of research. I guess I feel like the more educated I am on things that can go wrong or signs of abuse that I can prevent it.  I know logically that I can only do so much. I drive my husband nuts. I think I bug my friends too.  I cannot help it. I want to protect.  I want to make  a difference. I want to end their pain and suffering. I want to understand in some ways, in others I am SO glad to not be able to. The problem is just SO big. I thought getting it out would help but it doesn't. I feel the same. Well, my prayer list:
Layla Grace
Wax Family
MacClenahan family
Whitmer family
Spohr family
Cora's family
Catherine's family
my babies