Friday, February 5, 2010


I have been feeling lonely lately.  I haven't ever been one that has dozens of friends. I have always just kept two or three really wonderful people in my life. Well, now that we are all adults and have families of our own we are apart. I often get jealous of one friend of mines activities. She often posts about going out with some of our other friemds from school.  It's silly to feel that way, she has no idea I'd even want to go.  Plus I work on the weekends when most people are off of work, so even though logically it makes sense, it hurts still. I was so down about being out here away from all of my family and friends that my husband basically demanded me to go to mommy and me this past Wednesday.  I am glad he did.  I haven't been since October, they were great.  They made me feel missed and loved. I shall definitely return. They are such God fearing women that I worry that they wouldn't really like me if they really got to know me. I cuss, yell when I loose my temper, spank occassionally but threaten (my 9 year old) often, watch shows that aren't always appropriate (and enjoy them). Mylie had a good time too.  She even said she had fun and was happy. That was nice to see.  Last time we were there she was so shy that she just sat in my lap and watched the other kids.  Last week she actually interacted with the more docile ones. I went to the doctor yesterday.  My doctor does do they dorsal penile nerve block ~ WHAT A RELIEF!  I have worried about that all week.  I should really stay off of web md! I can really get myself all worked up. Fernando is doing well in school. Only four more weeks! I am happy for him as being unemployed was really getting to his sensse of pride, but I am REALLY gonna miss him.  He can make me completely bonkers, but it is so nice having him home. I pray that he finds something where he is home often(preferably every weekends so I can continue to work). Mylie will miss him like mad and I would like for Bronson to know his daddy. I don't know how to reach Talise lately.  She has been refusing to turn in her school work, rolling her eyes to her teacher, and rushing through things that bore her. Her teacher told me that when she asked Talise about the eye rolling Talise's response was that her mom told her that if she didn't have nice things to say then don't say anything.  True, I did say that. I had to take her project up to the school today because Talise did it, but was embarrassed by it. She didn't think it was good enough, which to me says she should've put a little more effort into it.  I just don't understand. When I was her age I loved praise from my teachers.  I loved bringing home all A's and having my name mentioned about doing something well at school. Talise doesn't seem to care.  It is quite frustrating.