Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Where did my sweet baby go?

She only sometimes shows up. Most of the time I see a moody toddler. One who hollers when told no, slaps and bites when frustrated and goes limp when being redirected out of the bathroom or Talise's room. It's tough letting her self wean on the nursing when she bites whenever she feels like it. I want to let her continue because it is her only security vice. She doesn't take a paci, she doesn't have a blankie or special doll or bear. Just me. Well my boob, or boose as she calls it. I like that she needs me. But it is tormenting when she bites and cries because she wants it but I am scared to give it to her because of nipple tenderness. Hmm, it's a tough call.
Talise is doing well. I feel like Fernando has been picking on her. It really bugs me. I am trying to not nag him about it but lead by example. That is taking a lot out of me because it seems like as soon as she steps foot in the van after school he starts. If it's not about her then it will be about on of her friends, or why she is friends with certain people. He just doesn't understand what he is doing. It saddens me and makes me angry all at once.
I am trying the love dare with him. VERY difficult! Yesterday, day one, wasn't bad. Today has been. Kindness is difficult to give when it is not being received. Also when you feel as though you are being pulled in three directions at once or having to referee it is also tough to remember to be kind.